Voice Mail and Saying "When" and Friends

So, when do we know enough is enough when we leave a voice mail for someone? Do we measure its content, the number of sentences, or how many minutes?

I just had the mother of a VM from a long-time friend (and we're talking looooong time friend...from third grade) that went on about a VM she left at my former job after I left, and the dates of our high school reunion (which I already knew 'cause I am a gold member of Classmates after all). By the way, never got that VM because I was already gone from the job...sorry!

I am absolutely guilty of leaving big-ass VMs at times. You kind of forget that the other person is not really there listening, and you go on and on as if you're actually having a conversation with that person. Is it a sign of the times or of age?

On another subject, I had dinner last night with three of my friends from work. I don't want to come off all Oprah, but it was such a restorative experience...much like visiting my former workplace last week. Friends, especially women friends for us chicks, are the best mirror of us we can have at times. We talked and laughed about our lives and others whose lives are beyond bizarro, and we had no fear of putting it out there.

If it is a true friendship, the smack to the head you get from a friend can be the wake-up to reality you need. When you're with women who are near your age or are in relatively the same place as you are with kids, work, etc., you can empathize with each other and feel like if you start to slip into a funk, a hand or hands will grab at you -- sometimes none too gently, but loving just the same -- and pull you up and be a support.

My daughter has a network of friends, and it is pretty much the same with them. Some friends she has known since high school, others from college, still others from work. Each of us serves a purpose and touches the other with our own special "something" that can be very powerful in its love and bluntness.

My friend who left the 10-minute monologue is one who I don't see on a regular basis, but who I have loved since meeting her in the third grade. When we connect -- either by phone or in person -- there is no sense of the distance of time...we pick up where we left off. While her life is a lot different from mine, it is also part of the woven fabric of it.

So, as for long-winded voice mails, we'll have to work on that. As for friends, the longer, the better!